5 Things To Do After Getting Engaged


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5 Things to Do After Getting Engaged

Getting engaged is one of life’s most exciting events.  After you have savored the moment with your new fiance, gotten a fresh manicure, and dusted off your Pinterest boards, metaphorically speaking, you’re probably thinking what’s next? You are filled with joy and anticipation as your relationship progresses and you begin planning a wedding and a life with the one you love.  While planning a wedding can be stressful there are actions you can take to make the process easier.   Once you have celebrated your engagement and are ready to embark on the great adventure that is wedding planning, I recommend these five steps in order. 

1. Determine a Budget

I cannot stress this enough, before doing anything else determine your budget. 

-How much can you spend and how much are you comfortable spending on your wedding.  Know your financial and personal limits.  If you have been saving in anticipation for a wedding, how much have you set aside? If you have savings but haven’t been thinking about paying for a wedding chat with your fiance and determine the amount you both feel comfortable spending.  Everyone views a wedding day differently, it is important to only spend what will bring you both joy.

-Is anyone else contributing money to the wedding? If so, what responsibilities and what input will they have?  It is not uncommon for parents to pay for some or all of a wedding.  If this is the case for you, then have those conversations before any decisions are made.  Make sure you know what people help you and they expect and be sure you set clear boundaries to ensure to minimize conflicts in the planning process.  If you are thinking about working with a wedding planner many of them will offer assistance in creating a wedding budget. 

2. Decide What Type of Wedding You Want

There are so many styles of weddings.  Do you want to have an intimate elopement? a Micro Wedding? or a more traditional wedding? Do you want to be married in a church? Near the water? Destination? Local? 

It is important to have an open and honest discussion with your fiance regarding the picture you and your fiance have of the perfect wedding day.  Be open to compromises.  Elopements are  intimate.  You can choose the setting, the details, and the location-based on just you and your love.  A micro wedding is a beautiful compromise between a traditional wedding and an elopement.  It will allow you to celebrate with your closest loved ones while keeping costs down and focusing your resources on the things that will be most meaningful to you without the stress associated with a big party.  Traditional weddings can be as elaborate and varied as the people involved.  In many ways a traditional wedding is a community and familial celebration including fun, friends, family and festivities.  There is no right answer to the type of wedding except but here are a few things to consider as you make your decision and begin your planning:

-What are the musts for your wedding?

-Who are your VIP guests, the people who you cannot celebrate without, and where would be a good place for them to gather? 

-How much are you willing to spend per guest? Food, drink, the venue will all consider headcount for costs. 

3. Determine Your Top Three Priorities

This is something I always stress with my couples.  Weddings involve a lot of planning, pick your top three most important items or activities. For me, it was the dress, the photographer, and the flowers.  I knew that my budget was limited and so I decided very early in the planning stage that I was going to spend a little extra and take the time to make sure these three things were exactly what I wanted, and then I was going to take a deep breath and allow more flexibility and help with the other elements of my wedding.  I was able to turn over decorations to my mom and this was a huge help! You absolutely can stress yourself to death worrying about every tiny little thing but in the end, this will detract from your wedding day and the joyous occasion it will be.  So don’t do that to yourself! Pick some priorities and put your effort and resources there.

4. Make a Wedding Email

You have probably realized by now that what makes a successful marriage and a successful wedding is communication.  So, I strongly recommend that you create a wedding email.  I always suggest an email dedicated specifically for your wedding to keep things organized. You can then share the password with your fiance, mother, maid of honor, or whoever will be helping with your plan. It is free to make a new Gmail account and then all the details can be in one space and easily accessed for those involved in planning. It can be as simple as smithswedding@gmail.com.  I am telling you, this is a game-changer.   

5. Pick a Date

This one can be tricky because to a certain extent it may be outside of your control.  It is never too early to contact vendors for your top priorities, looking at venues, and discussing dates with the people closest to you.  Time of year can affect wedding costs, travel for guests, availability of venues and vendors.  I have a separate blog dedicated solely to this topic.  Your venue availability will play a large role in setting your date.  The wedding industry as a whole is still recovering from Covid and this has caused vendors to book farther ahead than has been customary.  Be patient during this step.  It can be frustrating, but setting a date and securing your venue are two of the more difficult challenges.  The good news is that once this is done you are well on your way!

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I am so excited for you as you begin this wedding planning journey! Leave a comment below if you found this helpful!

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